My Risk Factors

Not only is it important to give gratitude to the people and circumstances which have supported me in my

journey, but it's also important to acknowledge the things that serve as obstacles to my development.

Through acknowledging these obstacles, I can better plan the path forward for myself in order to minimize

the effects of these risk factors and leverage my strengths and support systems to achieve my goals in a

way that allows me to also respect Cura Personalis.

Low Self-Esteem

Throughout my years in Junior High School, I'd definitely describe myself as someone which had low self

esteem. I believe this really started before I even transferred to Xavier Ateneo in grade 8. Just from

the descriptions of my family on Xavier as this sort of rigorous school with big workloads, I already

believed I wouldn't be able to handle it. I always thought of myself as someone who is smart but lazy.

These feelings were exemplified when I almost failed in first quarter of grade 8. Although my self esteem

has gotten better over the years, there are still aspects in my life in which I feel highly insecure about

such as my skills in math and science. It feels like since others see me as this sort of smart person that

I should live up to their expectations, but I never feel enough for myself.

Aside from academics, I also feel very insecure about my interpersonal skills. In grade 8, I made no friends

in my old class. Everyone knew me, but my lunches were always spent alone. Even though I have made friends since

then, I still feel very insecure because I am afraid of the possibility that they might stop being friends with me

if I do or say anything to upset them. This causes my friendships to feel very surface level. I don't feel close

with anyone, but I'd still call them my friends.

Stress and disappointment are normal feelings to feel. However peoples' responses to these feelings vary

widely. Personally, especially in my early years, I usually would push these feelings away by procrastinating

and then after procrastinating, I would feel more stressed and dissapointed causing me to procrastinate more.

Although I would say it has gotten better now, it still serves as a major roadblock sometimes. Especially when

the year is almost ending, and I feel most tired.

This obstacle has been there since Junior High, but I only started noticing recently. Money is a very

important resource in achieving your goals. Like now, I'm currently saving up to buy my own laptop to

do my work on. However, I've noticed that it's really hard for me to control myself when I see the

opportunity to buy something that I don't necessarily need, but would be nice to have. For example, recently

I bought a kindle for P3000. It's really a nice thing to have since it's very much a hassle to bring around

paper books. But it's not something I really need. That's why up until now, I'm not even halfway to my goal

of buying a laptop. Even buying snacks at school has been really hard for me to resist. It feels like a small

expense in the moment, but it really adds up.

In conclusion, overcoming risk factors is not merely a one-and-done type of thing. It requires you to

acknowledge their presence and admit that you, as a person, are not perfect. Therefore, as a student,

I will make sure to use prayer and reflection as tools, not to completely get rid of risk factors,

but to help me rise above them. It's important to think of risk factors not as obstacles in the greater

scheme of things, but as tools for you to develop resilience, and a character ready to face any risk

factors that may arise anew in the future.